Thanksgiving with MAGA

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submitted 2 weeks ago by 🃏Joker@sh.itjust.works edited 2 weeks ago

Talking Points for Thanksgiving With MAGA Relatives:

Can't wait until we have to pay more for everything.

I heard Trump is giving Texas to Putin so we don't have to worry about illegal immigration.

97% of gender affirming surgeries on people under 18 are removing breast tissue for straight boys, I look forward to boys finally getting their boobs back.

Please add your own ideas.

Mastodon.

@RickiTarr<br />
I can't wait for my annual bleach shot.<br />
Have you already paid your premium insurance for falling Starlink satellites?<br />
What do you think about the new bill to deport people with any kind of immigrant ancestors?

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89 Comments

"Cant wait for Social Security to be abolished, these useless old people should just die and not waste our resources."

*elderly relatives sitting nearby*

(/s Lol, luckily I don't know anyone that voted trump, I mean I don't know what distant relatives voted for, but they're in another state so I don't care 🤷‍♂️)

Conservatives unironically agree. If you're not successfully rent seeking by retirement age, you should work until you die on your feet.

a week ago

No I don't old people built the world we have now wtf

Obamacare and all.

2 weeks ago

"How do you deal with the fact that Trump will die of old age soon and you basically voted for J.D. Vance instead?"

They don’t care, they like Vance too.

They relate to his general unlikability and being a piece of shit person.

Whatever makes sense.

2 weeks ago

looks like people missed the reference

Okay, good.

2 weeks ago

Many more used to too

That's literally why my several members of my family voted for Trump. They really don't like Trump (they voted for Nikki Haley in the primaries), but they really like Vance and hope he'll take over at some point.

I was blown away, because I was under the impression that Vance was fairly universally disliked. I immediately responded with some equivalent of "clearly we watch very different news."

2 weeks ago

Wait, it's physically possible to like Vance? I was sure the dislike is on a genetic level like uncanny valley.

I was blown away, because I was under the impression that Vance was fairly universally disliked

Different media diets create different opinions. You're not shoveling Ben Shapiro, Tucker Carlson, and Joe Rogan down your ear holes every day. That shapes your view of the world just like Stewart and Colbert and Aaron Sorkin did for millennials.

They would vote for Kim Jong Un if they thought it would it would upset “libruhls”.

Here's a fact, there are an overwhelming number of north Koreans that support kim jong un despite it being insane. There is no saving these people. There is no walking them back. We either submit to their cause or they will drop the nukes themselves. The sooner we come to terms with it the sooner we know what must be done.

Asking north koreans rather or not they like their murderous dictator that will make their family disappear is not exactly a good indicator if average citizens likes him.

That's what trump wants for you.

2 weeks ago

I think the point is that no matter how objectively awful a person is, *someone* out there is going to like them regardless.

There seems to be a pretty strong correlation between the age someones parents die and the age they're likely to die.

Trump's dad lived until 93 and his mom live until 88. He might be here for a bit.

2 weeks ago

Just learn to shoot straight.

They didn't have the lifestyle problems he does though. His diet, lack of exercise, and possibility of long-term damage from COVID put him at a much higher risk of dying younger.

a week ago

We can only hope.

You know, there's technically nothing stopping them from voting for Putin as Speaker of the House.

Some mysterious falling out of windows later he could be president

What's mysterious about a tragic suicide?

The convenience of it always happening to people who are harsh critics or in the way of putin. Just always to mysterious. That or standards for windows are terrible

Nothing mysterious about that, I too would suicide if I didn't see the glory that is Putin.

*blinks twice*

2 weeks ago

Where the person shot themselves.in the back of their head?

Twice?

With two different guns?

This is how I, too, would end my life if I were a dirty dissenter.

It would almost be worth it to watch him having to deal with all the MTGs he's put in congress

Mikael Trotsky Gorbechevs?

seriously tho what is the russian MTG equiv? I bet whatever it is, right now it's squatting on a curb smoking a filterless cig

You know what, I'm convinced.

Deport everyone with immigrant blood from America.

I think we should just deport everyone, no matter what. It'll be a nice little sanctuary after.

Bro's trying to deport the Indians on Thanksgiving 💀

2 weeks ago

Wouldn't be the first time.

2 weeks ago

Do they celebrate Thanksgiving in India?

I can't wait for white people to come up with yet another term to refer to the indigenous peoples of the present-day United States here in like 50 years

Yellowstone+

Mormons would just start deporting First Nations people.

2 weeks ago

Wait, I can get my moobs removed?

You've already received a joke answer, so yes, breast reduction surgery for guys is a thing. And sometimes the doctor can convince some insurance companies to cover it. But ymmv, because USA.

What if I have access to TJ doctors? Any downsides? Scars or whatnot?

Just asking for a friend. Don't tell him I asked

Honestly I don't know more than I already said. But at least now you know to start asking those questions to some doctors. Since you wouldn't be left with any breast undercurve to hide a scar, I should think you'd want a good plastic surgeon who's done men.

2 weeks ago, edited 2 weeks ago

I used to work on a plastic surgery clinic and we did mastectomy/breast reduction (removal of all or some breast tissue) a decent amount for cis men, cis women, and trans men. I even did the insurance paperwork for all of the non-cosmetic procedures.

Different insurance companies have different criteria for breast reduction and/or mastectomy. You can call your insurance company and ask them to send you the "Medical Necessity Criteria" for mastectomy or breast reduction for an adult male. You can also schedule a consultation with a plastic surgeon and they can run it through your insurance after doing an exam and taking measurements and whatnot.

The procedure itself is pretty straightforward, it's usually an outpatient surgery and you go home the same day. There will be a small, linear scar, usually along the underside of the breast, but they sew it under the skin, so the scar is very minimal when it heals. Depending on how much tissue they have to remove, you might have to have drains in there with tubes that come out through the skin for a couple of weeks to make sure you don't end up with a fluid collection, and you'll most likely need to wear a binder of some kind for 2-4 weeks to also help prevent fluid accumulation. Your individual situation might vary, so make sure to write down all of your questions to bring to your consultation appointment to go over with the surgeon.

Pro tip for in-demand medical specialties: the easiest time to schedule an appointment with them is usually January and February because everyone's deductible reset on the new year and people don't want to pay the out of pocket costs if they can avoid it.

Tijuana doctors? Just make sure you pay first and pay it in full.

If they moo-ed they are sentient cows already, and will produce milk any day now.

2 weeks ago, edited 2 weeks ago

Hair transplants and testosterone supplements are gender affirming healthcare

Viagra and toupes

So is removing breast tissue from teenage boys, give boys boobs back!
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gynecomastia

Yes, but the enforcement is selective so they won't be targeted.

a week ago

Isn't it weird how theres a conservative "argument" about morningafter pills, "if it's genuine rape, God has ways of stopping a pregnancy", but the same people wouldn't see anything wrong with taking Viagra despite their god-given sexual impotence.

The hypocrisy

Can't wait to pay for my compulsory advertising on X.

It'll be really funny seeing people die from listeria after drinking listeria milk on purpose

Putting the CEO of a space ship company in charge of the government's space ship funding makes about as much sense as letting Congress vote on giving themselves raises

2 weeks ago

Trump is going back to being a Democrat. I feel like I've been lied to, but you obviously saw it coming and was one step ahead of me all along. Well played.

I heard his AG has plans to send in the military to take away your guns! For your safety!

Heard about something about how his AG pick potentially making it so at least people must register their guns. No idea how true or if it's gonna happen, but I imagine that alone would be enough to make a lot of his voters super angry.

2 weeks ago

Well it's difficult to oppress people with weapons.

2 weeks ago

I was thinking about explaining that trump legalized trans weed last time he was president so why not go fully legal?

2 weeks ago

Bird saying what with a look of concern

Here’s the source

It’s truly amazing that orange man legalized weed in 2018.

You know for a goddamn fact that nobody in congress nor the orange man intended to do this.

Yet another example of old white men legislating on stuff they don’t understand but at least in this case it’s a win for us

Thanks, that was educational. I had incorrectly assumed they were all synthetics when I heard they were selling in dry states.

I mean, honestly I think it really cuts to the root of it - they didn't care, because they believe in nothing.

They wanted to create a business opportunity for the billionaires bribing them their buddies, and they literally give no shits about side effects (unless someone rich is willing to pay to change the side effects)

2 weeks ago

I've tried to explain what delta 8 vs delta 9 is too many times so I'm trying to simplify it.

Well that clears that up

2 weeks ago, edited 2 weeks ago

Weed isn't a single drug, it's a complex plant that contains many psychoactive compounds called cannabinoids. The best known and (probably) most intoxicating of these is what's commonly called THC, technically delta-9-THC, though over 100 others have been identified so far. Some of these are highly (pun intended) psychoactive while some appear, at least to the user, to be pharmacologically inert. Regardless, a hastily-written 2018 federal farm bill which was partially intended to legalize commercial hemp essentially legalized all of them including even tiny (<0.3%) concentrations of delta-9. That has allowed for a massive market of legal (in states which haven't since passed their own laws saying otherwise) weed. It's not the same weed sold by regulated recreational/medical dispensaries in legal states, though. Rather, these are the products you may have seen in gas stations and head shops, most of which contain at least some delta-8-THC, a compound that is very closely chemically related to delta-9. The key thing to understand, though, is that despite very similar chemical structures, two related drugs can vary substantially in terms of their potency and subjective effects.

I think that's about as simple as I can make it but I'll be over here spending my Thanksgiving evening in bed with my dogs and a bottle of wine if anyone has questions.

edited because grammar and ADHD are hard

2 weeks ago, edited 2 weeks ago

There is a very good reason to know this information, because not all camnabanoids should be concentrated.

My stomach and the CHS disease I have is living proof of that.

There is one brand, FVKD. I can choke one of their disposables down every week with zero ill effects.

Another, bought blindly, after a month of use will cause my gut to go into spasms until I stop using it.

The only proof I get is trial and error. My only real guess is that a usual dosage of BHO extracted straight from the plant has a lower amount of some of these bad cannabinoids and the ones FVKD and similar companies who actually give a fuck have chosen for their blends are the ones we most benefit from.

More testing is needed for these products, 100%.

That's not what it says

the study found that cisgender males accounted for the vast majority of breast reductions, with 80% of surgeries among adults performed on cisgender men and 97% of surgeries among minors performed on cisgender male teens.

https://www.hsph.harvard.edu/news/features/gender-affirming-surgeries-rarely-performed-on-transgender-youth/

everyone should save their grocery store receipts and compare them to similar purchases a few months from now

by [deleted]
2 weeks ago

I can't wait for them to have the same kind of behavior that GOP voters did when they re-elected George Bush back in 2004.

"He whuh" "Huh whuh" I voted for Trump whuh" As their head spins to see that he'll do nothing for them when they believed that he would.

2 weeks ago, edited 2 weeks ago

I have a prediction to make.

I don't believe Trump will pardon most convicted Jan6ers.

He might pardon one or two here and there, but the bulk will stay locked up.

The reason is twofold:

  1. Most of the Jan6ers have nothing to bargain with, Trump won't waste his time pardoning people who he can't use...
  2. These are dangerous people, they have shown that they are willing to attack the government, and that is not what he would want now.
2 weeks ago

He'll pardon them in time to help him get that third term

2 weeks ago

Most of them will be out before the end of his second term because our justice system is a mockery of itself and the punishment for attacking the seat of government with intent to harm or kill the congresspeople inside is essentially a slap on the wrist. A few years in prison was the typical sentence. Some got only a few months and are already out, others are in there for up to 15 years.

Genuinely he won't have to pardon more than a handful of them anyway if he just waits until he's leaving office for (hopefully) the last time and then he can say he made good on that promise. But make no mistake, he does not care if those dedicated and loyal followers who flew to D.C. on his command and committed treason in his name rot in prison for the rest of their lives. We could only be so lucky.

2 weeks ago, edited 2 weeks ago

He was nearly killed by exactly one of those kinds of people. No way will he pardon them.

2 weeks ago

Thing is a lot of those memories died when COVID hit the GOP constituency the hardest.

Replied to a comment in this thread already but dropping this here for visibility

Orange man legalized weed on a federal level in 2018. Source here

2 weeks ago, edited 2 weeks ago

Technically Congress legalized it. It's right there in the title of the article you linked:

"When lawmakers voted to allow hemp production in 2018, they quietly opened the door to legal THC in all 50 states."

*Edit: typo